The Story So far…. Paige + Tim = Pim

I feel as if I should introduce myself properly – my name is Paige Haines, I am a qualified civil engineer  turned healing practitioner & Stress relief consultant!! Yep pretty diverse! I am 30 years of age and decided after travelling for quite a few years and indulging in a life of pure abandonment and self-abuse I decided that it was time to come home and face reality.  You see like many of us have done I was running away from past hurts and issues and so embarked on my journey of self discovery and healing.

This was long and involved and continues today but essentially at the core of my self-abuse and low self esteem was a deep seated issue of low self worth, stemming from, I believe, conception and the belief system I instilled that my father didnt want me and nor did his family, this lead to numerous incidents in my life not least of all sexual abuse at age 17 – I managed to mask all of this quite cleverly by a tough exterior and the image that I  had it all together – ask some of my closest friends and they would never have known – that was until I annihilated myself through alcohol to forget.  Part of my healing journey was bodywork, part of it was self-healing, part of it was sexual healing, part of it was emotional healing and part of it was energy work.  A massive part of it was supportive people and the desire to be the person I knew I could be!

What resulted was a total life transformation, a happy Paige with a loving partner, Tim, a family that is connected and loving and meaningful friendships and relationships – a far cry from the shell of the person who arrived home from travelling 4 years ago!   So it didn’t happen overnight it definitely took time – as most of you would appreciate – these journeys keep on keeping on but are well worth the effort.

So that brings me to today – now we have a little one on the way!!! His/ her nickname is Pim by the way! thanks to my  girlfriend Cath for that! – Paige+Tim = Pim! We are not finding out Pim’s sex until the birth so Pim will remain asexual in my references!

The preparation I have done so far? To be honest I have limited my intake of information to quality publications so as not to overwhelm such as Sarah J Buckley’s and Orgasmic Birthing.  I do have a book by Sheila Kitzinger – Pregnancy & Childbirth which I am slowly working through and I am also signed up to a website that sends me weekly updates.  Oh there is also an app on the iphone (of course there is!)  called i-pregnancy – this is a bit naff but it enables me to read out little snippets to my partner Tim when we are driving somewhere together to keep him involved and feeling apart of it all! it also has example photo’s at each week of development of what our Pim might look like!

I have, with my partner had a yoni massage which is a tantric practice and essentially massages the vagina internally to release any stress and tension held there.  I was made aware of this through some of the healing work I have done previously and believe it is a big component of freeing up our Yoni’s to be as relaxed as possible during birth.  I am practicing yoga on an almost daily basis, walking daily (well mostly!) and also doing some Qi gong – all through downloads off the internet and dvd’s as I live 45 minutes out of Brisbane and trying to get to classes can be a nightmare!

I took my friends’ advice and I have been gentle, eliminating where possible all unnecessary stress from my life – well I consider all of it unnecessary actually! I have had 2 doctors appointments and a flying visit to a dermatologist for an unsightly heat rash that plagued me after returning on a 30 hour flight from London.  Funnily enough – it was my emotional “stuff” that was causing that rash and once I looked at that – only then did the rash begin to heal – a huge lesson in how much your body speaks your mind….(another favourite book of mine by Debbie Shapiro and well worth a look!)

I have had one Kahuna massage with an awesome masseuse and am planning on having one once/month and I am also looking into colonic irrigation.  My diet has been pretty crazy which I guess is to be expected but I would like to get a handle on that.

I have spent as much time as possible in nature – walking on the beach, bush walks where possible and just sitting outside and breathing in fresh air… we are lucky enough to live on acreage so I even saw a wallaby and her joey hop through our yard today – beautifully healing!!!

I am trying to eat organic and although I am usually vegetarian I have added in some lean red meat to my diet as I have felt as if my body has been craving it.

I have had a kineaseology session and quite a few reconnective healing sessions to assist with my fear and issues with dealing with the impending changes that I have most definitely felt scared over – also the crazy changes in my body – my boobs are huge! And hugely sensitive! My tummy is bigger than I expected for 15 weeks but that could be just my vanity speaking !

Already speaking to people about not having scans and looking at the possibility of homebirthing has brought up a lot of fear… I have had comments like:

“ you live too far away from a hospital”, “its so much better to have all of the machines handy and ready if there are any complications” “but how will you know if something is wrong with the baby if you don’t get scanned?” “Homebirth is dangerous”

All valid points perhaps?! But ultimately its mine and my partners choice to make and I believe we are making an informed choice.  Ha ha and when I have mentioned “Orgasmic Birthing”…. Well lets just say mothers in general don’t believe its possible, my sister just wants to run and hide as soon as I mention the “O” word and well I think my mum is a little nervous that I want them to watch the DVD with me! Tee hee bless her – she wouldn’t say anything though and I know she will watch with an open mind…

So my trusty readers, its up to us to educate! Help me help others and also get there myself – any suggestions along my journey would be greatly appreciated! I have some ideas on how I am going to do this but as I am a novice it would be great to hear from others, who have already birthed orgasmically, who are in the process of learning as I am or who just have a suggestion!   I will be blogging at least once – twice per week – perhaps more – it’s a pretty juicy subject I reckon we will have lots to talk about! Till next time – practice those orgasms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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